Friday, 25 January 2008

Can you wear my shoes.....

It's a night before our 1st wedding anniversary and we are trying hard to look happy.
We have planned an anniversary party strictly by invitation with all the works.....
But we are not excited about it......not anymore.
Hubby and I went to see an Obstetrician/Gynaecologist.
We did some fertility tests and he booked us in for an appointment at the close of work today.
I was hoping to hear him say: There's no problem.......
Well,there is a problem.
But LORD, why us? Why LORD? Why?!!!
The doctor said my test results were okay, but I have a fibroid growing on my womb, but it won't affect conceiving or carrying to full term.
The bad news: My husband's sperm count is low, very low.
I held hubby and cried. He held me quietly and kept whispering: Babes, I'm sorry....I'm sooo sorry. Please don't cry.
The doctor said not to blame him or take it out on him and not to stress him.
I said: I'll be mad to do that! What if it was me?
I turned to hubby and said: Babes, I don't blame you. We are in this together.
Doc: Calm down
Me: I can't....cos we don't deserve's not fair. why doctor?...why?,,,why....
Doc: There's a solution....
He said I was going to be placed on some drugs during the third day of my next period and then hubby's sperm would be released directly into my womb with the use of some big injection-like tube. He said there's hope and it's not a bad scenario and we were tackling it early blablabla
As he spoke, tears ran down my cheeks uncontrollably, hubby held on to me gently.
Doc: Madam, please take it easy. Do you need some time alone?
Hubby: (gruffly) Yes please
As he left us, I started sobbing quietly....
Self-Pity....Why Me? Why Us? Why LORD? Why?! Why?!
Hubby: Babes, I am sorry for putting you through this
Me: I am not crying for me. I am crying for us. I am sorry if it makes you feel worse but I just can't stop it....cos we don't deserve this.....

My heart is bleeding.....
You have to wear my shoes to understand how I feel

Saturday, 5 January 2008

Buyer Beware

Just a short post.
Hubby has a new secretary.
She combines personal business with work.
She made hubby buy a size 18, (French Kiss???) Skirt with jagged edges for me.
She sold him aloe-vera roll on (Forever Living Product)
She sold him a bracelet(Romanian gold)
She sold him 3sets of bed-sheets
I have warned hubby not to tolerate her again.
Her job function is to be a secretary and she shouldn't be selling stuff during working hours.
Hubby said that she ususlly corners them in the parking lot(yes, hubby's not her only victim) and that she's very efficient in performing her official duties.
If hubby can't say no...can I give her a call and advise her to stop forcing things on my hubby????
What do you reckon?