I joined mum in the
My JAMB score had been too low to secure a university admission.
Mum gave me £300 to get a new wardrobe and winter clothing, it was a lot of money then..
She asked a friend if her 'fashionable daughter' could take me to the shops.
’Miss Fashionable: (MF)’ arrived looking smashing: nice clothes, knee-length boots….
Mum gave her some 'transport money' and told her to help maximize my £300 shopping money.
She sounded like ‘oyibo’ to my bush self and when I tried to speak my own oyibo too, she said I sounded like an Indian and asked if I attended an Indian school back home?
That was quite embarrassing and I felt hurt afterall, I had an A1 in English Language so I shut my mouth.
We took the bus 73, then a routemaster, to Oxford Circus.
MF: (as we entered House of Fraser) I do most of my shopping here.
I thought wow! and I was eager to start shopping.
I almost tripped on the elevator as I looked at the splendor around me.
We finally arrived at the clothing section after some meandering.
MF: This is their winter range. Oh this jacket looks lovely! (It's a black leather looking jacket) And it's so cheap, just £300….....How much do you have again?
Me: £300
MF: Why not take this jacket, it’s on sale.
Me: But that's all the money I have for a new wardrobe
MF: (hiss) This jacket is top quality, designer made. It's unique and it'll last you for years!!! It is a very good buy!
Me: I'm also hoping I can buy boots and some turtle-neck sweaters.
MF: What??!!
I repeated myself.
MF: Can you talk slowly. I can't understand you
I repeated myself yet again, feeling deeply humiliated.
MF: Oh! Okay. Look around and let me know if there's anything u want.
Me: Is this where you bought your jacket?
MF: Hell no! I bought this one in Harrods.
Me: Can we go there?
MF: Trust me, it’s nowhere near £300
Eventually, I chose a navy blue knee length wool top-coat that wasn't all that.
It cost me £185 and it was hideous!
At Topshop, I bought a pair of knee-length, patent skin, stiletto-heeled boots for £65 and a pair of blue corduroy bottoms for £25
At Selfridges, I bought a dirty, blue turtle-neck sweater on clearance sale for £24.
I despised mum for humiliating me with her miserly £300.
On getting home, mum looked at my shopping and asked MF: House of Fraser? Selfridges? With £300?
MF said she had to hurry but mum insisted she stayed while we went through my shopping and did she yell when she saw my ‘lavish spending’
MF insisted I had selected everything myself and the shops were on sale.
MF’s ‘oyibo’ accent had suddenly disappeared.
Mum asked for my receipts and I told her MF had said we didn’t need them so we didn’t have any and couldn't return the goods.
Mum was F-U-R-I-O-U-S!
She called MF’s Mum on speaker phone.
Mum: My friend, I didn’t even ask where your daughter does her shopping
MF’s Mum: MF ke, you know she works with charity. She knows all the second-hand markets and charity shops in this
Mum: Ehn, ehn. What of Selfridges et al?
MF’s Mum: Nooooo. All those charity shops sell designers oh, maybe just secondhand but they sell correct designers that sisi(s) {young gals} like.
Mum proceeded to report her daughter to her.
The woman was gobsmacked and apologized profusely.
MF was shedding crocodile tears and begging mum on her knees in Yoruba.
Mum said she had asked her to go with me so she could help me pick the things in vogue and she should have let her know that it wasn’t convenient.
Mum, MF and I went back to
The sales assistants even helped check the bins behind the counter for the receipts but we didn't find anything.
MF & her mum came over the next day, apologizing yet again.
MF’s Mum explained MF was probably trying to show off and that she didn’t mean any harm.
She gave me €100.
Mum took a day off work to show me around Haringey: Florentyna Village, Wood Green, Green Lanes and u shoulda seen what I bought with 100quid.
MF, her sister and I became really close (3 Musketeers) and we laugh every time we remember how MF posed and made me waste my mum's precious money.
I was on MF's bridal train when she got married in 2003 and her first daughter bears my English name.
So be very careful who you ask to show you around a new country or you might fall into the hands of show-offs like MF (lol)
Peeps, come to think of it, why do girls like posing(showing off/being fake) ?
I can be very down-to-earth oh but if I pose for you.......
BTW, I never wore the sweater and those boots had killer heels, so I only wore them a couple of times,,,,,,what a waste!
5 comments:
Na so babes dey do o!. when i dey Unilag those pepperless for Moremi hall sabi pose pass anything meanwhile shishi dem no get.
Thats just how girls are - competitive and they try very hard not to tell you the truth about where they get their own things until u get into their 'inner circle' LOL!!
I'm sure you both have laughed over this episode over and over again. She must have been fuming at having to show a 'JJC' around the shops when she could have been out with her other girlfriends. LOL!! Nice Post.
Very funny! Poor JJC copido!
Not all babes are competitive though(What are they competing for sef?)I cant imagine myself doing that to someone.
So dey pose eh?
@ Ubong Da
lmao. But guys pose too....
@ Calabar Gal
I'm telling you we've laughed it over too many times. She was actually only trying to show off as a designer chic and she actually didnt think I was going to buy @ those prices.
@ Princess:
Me too, won't do it to anyone.
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