My First Suspension

Back in Primary School, I hated Needlework cos I just couldn't sew no matter how hard I tried.
Not surprisingly, my needlework teacher hated me sooo much.
She made snide remarks about my hair being too long/unkempt, my shoes being too fancy for school and my needlework fabric being over the top.
I always ended up kneeling down in a corner of the class for one reason or the other and she would beat my knuckles sore with a heavy wooden ruler after each class.
She was very ugly and wicked and her hatred for me was very mutual.
I hated her from the depth of my soul.
I feigned illness several times to avoid going to her class but that only worked once.
Another time, I actually hid in the toilet and as I returned to class afterwards, I met her waiting for me in front of my class.
There was nowhere to run as she grabbed me and pinched my nose and ears till they were scorching hot and then she made me crawl to her office.
When we got to her office, I knelt down in my 'corner' and endured her knuckle-hitting ruler yet again.
It was the last time I tried to avoid her class.
Her name was Ms Ukoh, a dark, short, Calabar woman with teeth too large for her mouth.
She had thick sagging lips and wore jerry-curls and she was truly very ugly.
Her very big tummy was the same size as her very big bum.

One wet Thursday afternoon, we were lined up in needlework class to show her our homework.
I was last on the queue and there was a girl (Hadiza) just before me.
Hadiza: She's going to beat me, I didn't do my cross-stitches
Me: I did mine but I'm sure she won't like it
Hadiza: Why is she always beating you?
Me: She hates me
Hadiza: I hate her too
Me: Me too, I really really hate her. I think she's very ugly.
Hadiza: Witch! She's the ugliest teacher in the school. I wonder who even gives her money to do her jerry-curls
Mrs Ukoh: The two of you at the back, come here. What did you just say?
Me: (Shocked and teeth chattering in fear) Nothing
Hadiza: Nothing, we didn't say anything
Mrs Ukoh: You will repeat what you said today or you are dead
Me & Hadiza: Mrs Ukoh, we didn't say anything
Mrs Ukoh: Nene, get me a cane from the garden. Everybody can sit down, you two kneel down

As we knelt down, I started thinking: I'm done for! How could she have heard us from that distance when we were barely whispering! She must really be a witch!
Hadiza & I started weeping as Mrs Ukoh stared at us with pure hatred.
The cane arrived.
It was very long and tough.
Mrs Ukoh swiped the cane in air and demanded: 'I said what did you say?'
Hadiza: She..she...she's the one. She's the one that said that she hates you and you are ugly and that who gives you money to do your jerry curls
Class: Haaaaaaaa!
Mrs Ukoh had never looked so furious..……...or ugly: ‘I will kill you today’
Me: Ah Hadiza! You’re lying. You are the one that said who gives her money for....
I never finished the sentence as the cane hit me just then.
I screamed and writhed on the floor as the cane hit me over and over and over again.
Hadiza was not spared either.
I pretended to swoon and faint but she just continued beating us.
We both screamed in sheer agony and I remember passing out a couple of times and waking up to the pain.
Mrs Ukoh: (panting) I'll teach you a lesson you will never forget today. Even if you die, I'll follow you to your grave and wake you up from the dead.
She beat us like we were thieves for the better part of her period.
When she was through, we were covered with bruises and barely able to cry, walk or talk.
Hadiza had passed out and she had to be carried out of Mrs Ukoh's class.
My class teacher, whose daughter was a witness to the beating, had a confrontation with Mrs Ukoh as beating had been banned in the school.
We were taken to the school doctor who was also disgusted that someone could beat children like animals.

We must have been sedated because, I slept off and woke up to the sound of angry voices: My Mum & Hadiza’s dad demanding to see the Mrs Ukoh, the proprietress or someone in authority.
The police were called and photographs taken,it was a serious matter.
Mrs Ukoh had somehow disappeared.
Hadiza’s father was a lawyer and he threatened to have Mrs Ukoh jailed.
My housewife mum also threatened to shut down the school and notify NTA (Nigerian Television station).
The school authority was very apologetic and an agreement was reached that a meeting would be held the following day to resolve the matter, they so begged my mum not to get the Press.

The next day, my mum asked me to take her straight to Mrs Ukoh’s class.
I would never forget, the monstrous woman was sewing an hideous, green fabric when my mum pounced on her.
Not one person could restrain my mum, my mum beat her oh, I won’t lie and I was very glad because I was somehow avenged.
During the meeting, Hadiza’s mother also slapped her and spat on her.
My dad was absent.

The school authority suspended Mrs Ukoh indefinitely, though she returned to work a month later after she wrote a letter of apology to both parents.
Hadiza and I also got suspended for a week for backbiting and for the misconduct of our mothers.
When we returned to school, we were the class heroines and there was no more needlework as no substitute teacher had been found.
I guess that’s why Mrs Ukoh got her job back.
Of course, it was no longer compulsory for girls to do needlework so Hadiza and I joined the boys in crafts class and moulded all sorts with plasticine.

But this world is indeed a small world because I met Mrs Ukoh again and I had my revenge.
Watch out for My First Sweet Revenge!